Why am I even here? I've been sitting by this phone the past hour and it hasn't even rung once. My hospital volunteer shift is over at 3 o'clock, but what will I do to entertain myself for the next hour? I've already read just about every flier and pamphlet within the area at least twice today. I really wouldn't mind this boredom if I could be on my phone, but even though there is no one in here, I feel bad taking out my phone while on "the job." I guess I'll just sit here in my closed toed shoes, long khaki pants, and ugly green polyester smock twiddling my thumbs, watching the clock as each minute inches by...
I suppose I could ask if there is anything I could do, but everyone is so busy, rushed, and stressed. And the last thing I want is a nurse to blow up and lose her temper over my lowly question. I'd really hate to bother anyone, and plus I'm sure there is nothing for me to do besides sit here by the door and watch the phone. Oddly enough, I find myself wanting someone to assign me a chore. Normally, I would hide from anything like this. But right now, I just want something, anything that will help pass the time. Even filing or stacking folders with fliers about healthy mothers and infants would trump the current excitement of staring at the walls. I am begging (internally of course) for a task, however menial it is.
After sitting here, nearly falling asleep, I realize that what I really should do, and desperately want to do, is exit the building and go home. I find myself fantasizing about it, but realize I would never leave before 3 o'clock in fear that there would be no one to fulfill my very important duties (manning the desk and standing guard to answer the phone that never rings). I convince myself that it would be irresponsible and unprofessional to leave without warning the staff. What would be most tactful in this situation would be to ask a nurse if there is anything for me to do and then notify them of my departure if not needed. I get up to search for a staff member, but no one is in sight. A part of me is relieved: phew, confrontation avoided! The rest of me, is incredibly bummed that I still face the same problem: boredom at its height, with no solution on the horizon.
Finally 3 o'clock rolls around and I'm free to go. At this point I realize that the nurses would have done just fine without me and would have been okay letting me leave early (I am just a volunteer after all) but instead to avoid any conversation that revealed my annoyance and discontent, I bottled it up and "suffered in silence" for those two dreadfully long hours.
No comments:
Post a Comment